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[23 Aug 2007|11:03am] |
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music |
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a skylit drive-theallstardiaries |
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oh yea. so i got all that off my chest and now i will never speak of it again for as long as i live. hopefully noone ever reads this shit anymore anyway.
it does feel good to just write shit down tho.
writing transforms those crazy fast paced thoughts into peice whole concrete piece of work. it takes that intensity away from the thoughts. the melodramatic moments of a memory are stripped down to simple letters and words.
i need to do this more often. i think it may help with the day to day bullshit i keep inside. then i can stop being such a fuckin drama queen sometimes.
shit isn't as bad as people make it out to be.
this school year is going to be about a million fuckin times better. I got this new house and with it new responsibilities. i might even save some fuckin money for once. and i'll have my endless chemistry classes to keep me busy and away from weed.
i smoked so much fuckin weed last fall/winter its not even funny. the only thing i remember from winter break is the snowboarding trip. and that was only 2 days. winterbreak was a month. the whole time was just a haze. but maybe its for the better since the last half of living in the hellhole should rightfully be forgotten.
so basically,
when you stare into the eye of a monster
jump ship and dive deep
cause it can swim faster than you
and is just dieing for your taste.
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[23 Aug 2007|10:50am] |
dont say it will stay this way forever.
there isn't much that i wake up in the morning for anymore other than to see her face.
there are also those few great friends that i have. they keep it real. and know who they are.
i'm so sick of motherfuckin bullshit. its understandable that people can do stupid things sometimes. like "talk shit" or go out with a dumb bitch for way to long. but there should have never been grudges or hard feelings from any of it. we're grown men now and its the fuckin bullshit high school mentality that keeps this drama going. since when does a few stupid actions cancel out all the other great times.
it doesnt make sense to me why a person that used to be a best friend to me and to many others could just fall off the face of the fuckin earth. well as for the day to day, i've lost nothing. i am who i am and have a ton of great people in my life.
i just feel bad for him.
and thats my 2 cents.
peace and love bro.
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[11 Jan 2006|02:24pm] |
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mood |
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 indescribable |
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music |
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kiss me, i'm contagious |
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i feel empty and alone.
sometimes i just don't know what to do anymore..and it seems thats when i end up on here. i don't want to be a fucking manic depressive even though it sounds like that. its just when my friends all leave for college again i feel like i lost everything all over again. i can feel my friends that haven't left slowly slipping away too. i guess i need to put somethings in the past and realize life won't be the same. i just don't know what the future is going to hold. it scares me becuase i don't want to be alone. and when i'm sitting in my room all day with noone to talk to, no car, and no one calling... i feel, for lack of a better word, alone. at least i have her. i don't know what i would do if she was gone. i think that scares me too. god damn i'm a bitch.
on a lighter note...i got paid yesterday. and got cool new shoes and a hoodie.
i need some weed! yup, now i only need a way to get it!
well i guess that gives me something to fuckin do.
i need school. i keeps me busy and sane.
i can't believe i fuckin said that but yea...i do
too much fuckin tony hawk will drive anyone crazy.
ah fuck it
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[28 Oct 2005|12:50am] |
so again, this will be my first entry in a while.
i only update this thing once in a blue moon anymore. i think its becuase life has been very good up until tonight. i usually find myself bitching on this thing so fuck here we go again.
i don't understand my own head sometimes. i confuse myself when i get mad at HER. of all fuckin people to take out my fruastrations on. maybe i should talk to the shrink. i don't like him though. psychologist = bad. theres a mother fuckin equation for you.
homecoming is on saturday and i'm actually excited... we need photo id...i guess i should go up tomorrow and try and get that fixed.
costume parties and my boo. thats what i'm talkin about.yizzle.
mike,pat,travis,mike,kate homecomeing is good.
so to end this all, i just want to say that i really hope she knows that i'm sorry. and that i'm going to figure all this shit out rite quick.
xletsjustsay we are slowingdownx:)
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[01 Oct 2005|07:30pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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he is legend |
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so today my dad came down to visit.
lets just say it wasnt one of the happiest days...
everything was going great when he first got here. i pulled up to the house and he was actually inside talking to my mom. very unusual....she even came with us to outback. and then, while checking his fucking voicemail on speaker phone, theres a fucking message from HER. yeaa..awkward, and completly fucked up any amount of "good" taking place.
boston bitchs can burn.
i'm brokeXx
happy 18th to t-fucker! yizzle
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[30 Aug 2005|08:19am] |
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mood |
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 happy |
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music |
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daylight bombings-the bled |
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so this is my first entry since like march i guess.
can't say i'm to dissapointed. i was never really to fond on this thing anyway.
but i should recap my life for all yall..
had a sick summer.
went to college.
hated it so i'm coming back today.
wor-wic is the light at the end of my tunnel.
thats sad...lol
i need to be home. back with sarah. back with my friends and family.
frostburg is not for me.
its funny how places change from how you remember them.
and they become soo strange and foriegn.
either way i wasn't happy up here and to me what the fuck is the point in doing something that doesn't make you happy.
you only live once.
you are the love of my life.
and i'm never leaving you again.
iloveyousmm
xoxoxoxoxo
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| sweet action |
[25 May 2005|03:05am] |
Your Birthdate: March 6 |
A birthday on the 6th of the month adds a tone of responsibility, helpfulness, and understanding to your natural inclinations.
Those born on the sixth are more apt to be open and honest with everyone, and more caring about family and friends, too.
This is a number associated with responsibility and caring - this birthday lends a degree of concern for others. |
<table width="400" align="center" border="1" bordercolor="black" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2">
You Have A Type B+ Personality |
B+
You're a pro at going with the flow
You love to kick back and take in everything life has to offer
A total joy to be around, people crave your stability.
While you're totally laid back, you can have bouts of hyperactivity.
Get into a project you love, and you won't stop until it's done
You're passionate - just selective about your passions |
</table>
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[20 May 2005|03:05am] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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life is different.
ithinkilikeit.
vh1 is funny sometimes. and they play more music.
i think i like that too
id have to say that i'm not in that bad of a mood today. its a nice change. last nght was amazing. it was definitly what i needed. i hope that every one of my friends know how much they mean to me. and i hope SHE does too.
loVe'
brett
i need more pictures..i have to get a memory card for my camera. i've decided i'm going to take tons of pictures of this summer
i want to remember this time. i need this summer to be good.
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[08 May 2005|07:59am] |
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depressed |
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music |
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The Best of Me-Underoath |
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There is a place where the sidewalk ends
And before the street begins,
And there the grass glows soft and white,
And there the sun burns crimson bright,
And there the moon-bird rests from his flight
To cool in the peppermint wind.
Let us leave this place where the smoke blows black
And the dark street winds and bends.
Past the pits where the asphalt flowers frow
We shall walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And watch where the chalk-white arrows go
To the place where the sidewalk ends.
Yes we'll walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And we'll go where the chalk-white arrows go,
For the children, they mark, and the children they know
The place where the sidewlak ends.
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| May 3, 2005 |
[04 May 2005|10:58pm] |
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mood |
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 cold |
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music |
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saosin-seven years |
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R.I.P
Justin L. Donaway
I pick up the telephone and hear a voice. "Whats up Man", I know this is Donaway. Anyone that knew him knows that. It is the little things like that, that will be missed. I will never again wake up early on a saturday morning to Justin calling me to hang out. I will never again ride by his house, him get in my car, and us go to a party. I will never get to watch him organize my glove compartment, becuase he thinks its "to messy". We will never spend another entire summer together doing nothing more than playing drums, guitar, and going to the beach. I just hope that where ever he is now, it is a place so much better than this world. He deserves it. You will always stay in the hearts of everyone who has ever met you.
we will miss you.
x<3x
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[23 Apr 2005|07:53am] |
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mood |
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content |
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music |
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ptw |
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greenday.
sarah.
peircing.
sarah.
<310/16/04<3
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[20 Apr 2005|01:40am] |
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mood |
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 anxious |
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silence |
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.ilikeyourbows.
ilikeyourcapstoox</5>x.
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[15 Apr 2005|12:34pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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music |
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autobiography of a nation |
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this is me
you are you
and i am more bored than i have ever been
please someone call me
oh wait...
someis.
thankyou. god.
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[25 Mar 2005|11:37am] |
Oh it's opening time
Down on Fascination Street
So let's cut the conversation
And get out for a bit
Because I feel it all fading and paling
And I'm begging
To drag you down with me
To kick the last nail in
Yeah! I like you in that
Like I like you to scream
But if you open your mouth
Then I can't be responsible
For quite what goes in
Or to care what comes out
So just pull on your hair
Just pull on your pout
And let's move to the beat
Like we know that it's over
If you slip going under
Slip over my shoulder
So just pull on your face
Just pull on your feet
And let's hit opening time
Down on Fascination Street
So pull on your hair
Pull on your pout
Cut the conversation
Just open your mouth
Pull on your face
Pull on your feet
And let's hit opening time
Down on Fascination Street
xloveinitalicsleavesyouwantingmore.
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[13 Mar 2005|08:45pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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truman show |
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i woke up this morning and knew things were different.
.imdyinginside.
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[09 Feb 2005|10:55pm] |
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mood |
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crazy |
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Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take
I'll be watching you
Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every night you stay
I'll be watching you
Oh can't you see
You belong to me
How my poor heart aches with every step you take
<3<3<3
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| HAHAHAHA |
[06 Feb 2005|11:32pm] |
Take the quiz: "Are you a Freak? ((pics))"
You are a Huge Freak!
You love sex! You might be a virgin, but you might not be! You think about sex all the time and always imagine having sex...(even if you don't act on it) You like kinky freaky stuff and love experimenting with new things! rarrr get em tiger!
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[06 Feb 2005|11:06pm] |
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mood |
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 loved |
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music |
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simpsons |
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we are perfect for each other.
Take the quiz: "What Kinda Kiss R U?"
Romantic Kiss
Lying in bed after making love and just doing whatever.
.iloveyou.
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